Wednesday, August 08, 2007

On Home Run 756

Or the Top Ten Reasons I love Baseball

Well, it’s over. Barry Bonds just hit home run 756, passing Hank Aaron as the leader on the all time home run list. Everyone has his or her own opinion on Bonds—especially regarding steroids, tax evasion, general niceness, etc. I have my own opinions, and I’m not too fond of cheating. I agree, however, that America is founded on the concept of innocent until proven guilty, so I shall not make any harsh judgments at this time.

Instead, I shall talk about my favorite sport: baseball. Baseball is what I consider a classy sport, and therefore, I’m happy that Bonds beat Aaron’s record at home in San Francisco. Anywhere else, he might have been booed. The classiness of the sport, however, was preserved as Bonds hit his 756th home run at home, and therefore in front of cheering fans. The only non-classy thing about tonight was the absence of Beelzebub—I mean Bud Selig. But then again, Selig never did have class.

In honor of Baseball, I shall present to you, my top ten reasons as to why I love it.
10. Baseball is the only game where you can walk in a run and not have it count as an official at bat.
9. 6-4-3 double plays make me tingle.
8. Suicide squeezes don’t hurt anyone.
7. The best players offensively fail 60-70% of the time. This helps my self-esteem.
6. Vin Skully and Yogi Berra—the best baseball commentators of all time.
5. Pinstripes would just look stupid on football and hockey players.
4. Jackie Robinson paved the way for civil rights in America.
3. Cool nicknames for ball park locals, including: Short Porch, Peske Pole, Bleacher Bums, Ivy, & Green Monster.
2. Cool nicknames for ball players, including: Rocket, Big Unit, Charlie Hustle, Yankee Clipper, Iron Horse, Big Papi, Christian Gentleman, and Big Hurt.
1. Yankee Stadium, Fenway Park, and Wrigley Field.

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